Sweetest Devotion
by isbreulla
Summary: One-Shot. What happened after Nicky goes back to Red on E13S04.


"Nicky, oh thank God! Where the hell have you been?" Red said as she climbed the stairs of the big empty pool and ran to have Nicky in her arms. "Hm?"

Red was crazy about the delay Nicky took to get back. Lichfield was in chaos over the riot, God knows what could have happened to her daughter. Red's soul hurt only to imagine that the guards could have taken Nicky away from her again, so it was a relief to see her little girl's face coming back to her.

"Okay, okay... I had to make sure you're okay, right?" Nicky said, pulling away from Red's tight embrace, while she touched her face tenderly.

"Where's Lorna?" Piper asked. "Is she okay?" Alex completed.

"Uh... I think so, yeah." Nicky replied indifferently trying to hide her feelings.

Leaving Lorna behind was the most difficult task Nicky had ever done. Lorna is the true love of her life, a love that for Nicky's bad luck, didn't seem to be reciprocated. Lorna loved Nicky, it was no secret to anyone, but Nicky might not be the person Lorna had dreamed about her entire life.

Nicky can feel Red's eyes glued to her back as she went down the stairs and walks to a quieter corner. Nicky sat on the floor and buried her face between her legs.

Red knew her daughter. The connection she and Nicky held was strong enough for Red to always know when Nicky wasn't well. Her girl seemed to want to be alone, soon everyone noticed and they didn't ask her any more questions. As much as Red wanted to leave Nicky alone, her maternal instinct wouldn't let.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Red said softly as she sat down beside Nicky on the floor.

"There's nothing to talk about." Nicky sighed and looked away. Nicky knew she couldn't hide anything from Red, but talking about her feelings for Lorna wasn't easy for Nicky, and it would be even harder in front of an audience.

"How's Lorna?"

"I made her go." Nicky sighed in an attempt to stifle the cry that Red knew was coming. "I made her give herself."

"Why?" Red said as she pulled a few strands of her now perfectly straight hair from Nicky's eyes.

"She's pregnant, Ma." Nicky answered in a crying voice. "She's going to have a baby with her husband, and she doesn't need me."

"She's what?" Red asked confused with the situation. I mean, she loves Lorna to death, but it wouldn't be the first time the brunette had invented something.

"She's having a baby," Nicky sighs. "And it's real this time, she did pregnancy tests, many of them, I just ... I couldn't let her come with me."

Red caught Nicky by the cheeks and looked into her eyes. "You did the right thing, darling, but it's a mistake to think she doesn't need you. You can't blame yourself for any of this."

"I know, I'm not blaming myself, it's just..." Tears begin to fill Nicky's eyes. "I called her husband to say that he couldn't give up on her, not now."

Red wiped the single tear dripping down Nicky's cheek. "I'm listening."

Nicky came over and lay in Red's arms. Finally, the other tears came and Nicky couldn't control them. Red hugged her daughter and tried to give her all the support and affection she knew Nicky needed. It was painful to hear Nicky sobbing and unable to do anything to ease her pain.

"I love her so much, but... I'm not what she wants." Nicky said, still crying. "I know she has feelings for me, she loves me, but I'm not what she's always dreamed of. Lorna always wanted to get married, having a husband and children. No metter how much she loves me, how much she wants me, she could never stay with me. "

"Shh ..." Red held Nicky firmly in her arms as if she didn't want anything to separate them at that moment. "Baby, you can't be sure of that, but even if it's true, you have to be stronger than that, malyshka."

Nicky took a deep breath. "I love her enough to be with her. I love this baby, and I'll be with her even if she doesn't want me the way I want her, I don't care."

"That's exactly what she needs." Red smiled, a little proud of her daughter. "And you little girl, you can never think that you don't deserve love. If it's not Lorna who will offer you this, it will be someone else."

Nicky nodded and erased the last remaining tears. "Thank you, Mommy".

They sat in the same position for another few minutes. Red stroking Nicky's hair as Nicky explained to the mother the chaos that was out there. The other people in the pool tried to ignore the scene that had just happened between Red and Nicky, they understood the connection between them, and between Nicky and Lorna, so they knew they had to respect the moment between them.

"Mom, you know that hair means nothing, right?" Nicky said gently trying not to hurt her mother. "I mean, mine most of the time means nothing to me. It's always messy for a reason."

"I know, malyshka," Red grinned. "Don't worry about it, I'm fine."

"No you're not," Nicky sighed. "None of us are, I don't think I'll be able to sleep after what we've been through."

"I don't think I'll make it either, but I'll make sure you get some sleep, baby," Red laughed as she tried to change the subject.

Nicky stood up from Red's lap and rubbed her eyes. "Ugh, my head hurts a lot, I wish I was high."

At this moment Red gave a firm slap on the back of Nicky's neck.

"Ouch! I'm kidding." Nicky groped for the spot where Red had hit her. "Actually I just need that vitamin you took." Nicky laughed and ran away before Red's hands could hit her ass.

"Do not play with me, little girl." The severe Russian accent made Nicky stop with her laughter. "I slipped but I'm still the mother here."

Red smiled at Frieda who was watching the pair and winked at her. She couldn't love Nicky more than she already loved. Red went from cautiously optimistic to extremely proud of her little troublemaker. All of them had visited hell and returned. It would not be easy for them to move on, and they didn't know what would happen after all that. Red had worried that all of this could affect Nicky's sobriety, seeing her mother being humiliated that way, clearly wouldn't made her any good. Red was the safe haven and Nicky's anchor, she's not sure everything will be okay, she's not sure of anything. But she knows that she will do everything possible for her daughters to be safe, she would try to heal all the pain Piscatella has caused, and would make sure that Nicky gets her sleep.

* * *

 **Hello, it's me... I know it's been a while, but I wrote this little one-shot and I thought I should share. Tell me what you think! xx**


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